courtneycrazeee, free, Brunette, young, wild

Withering away

I feel like I'm withering away as I get older every day- waiting for the day that I get sick of this life. An easy escape. The gateway straight to hell. Suicide.
I'm already burning in the flames of my own mistakes. Every day I live free but I'm chained to my past and regrets that I've been suppressing for years. I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm not smart enough, not experienced enough, not pretty enough, not am I mentally capable enough to live in this real life version of hell.
I'm beautiful in the outside but I feel ugly on the inside, but I'm the only person that can see my true self. When I look in the mirror I can't see anything but a failure. Nothing but but a piece if shit stuck on the bottom of someone's shoe. I don't love myself enough to actually accept myself for the stupid, selfish, lazy woman I've become. But, I'm still existing on this earth trying to make the best of each shitty fucking day. That's all that matters- I try.